Reasons I hate catching the bus
DISCLAIMER: This post may not be relevant to you if you live in the inner city.
1. People with speakered mobile phone who play gangster rap and or watch the Olympics on their phone - GET A HEADSET! Just because you enjoy listening to 50 Cent rap about bitches and hoes doesn’t mean anyone else does. Yes, your phone has speakers, we’re all very impressed. Also, people who scream into their mobile phone like there talking into a can with a piece of string attached. I’m sure the microphone is in working order Barry Bellower.
2. People who can’t stay in their seat and or have no concept of personal space. You know that revolting feeling when some one’s leg is just touching yours? Or when someones butt is literally two centimetres from your ear?
3. Bus drivers along with postal workers and RTA employees are an angry disgruntled bunch.
4. Arrival times are suggestive rather than real world indications of when the bus will arrive, if it arrives at all. If you’re as lucky as me and live in the inner west, then your bus isn’t likely to be the next one, or the next one or the one after that. If I had a dollar for every minute I spent waiting for a phantom bus, I’d be a very rich lady.
5. Public heroes who feel the need to tell you to move down or give up your seat. Who died and made you high-chancellor of automotive transport?
6. The constant rattling, roaring, swaying, jerking. A word of advice, don’t even think of resting your head on the window. It’s a recipe for pain.
7. People who don’t shower and or brush their teeth. There aren’t any open-able windows people, have mercy. We’re like sardines in a crushed tin box.
8. Bus drivers who can’t drive i.e. mount the kerb, drive over roundabouts, drive like they’ve got no place to be or at breakneck speed, run red lights and swoop threateningly close to cars.
9. Overcrowded buses that don’t stop even though you’ve been waiting half an hour, or sail right past your stop just because there are a couple of buses there already (which are always for bloody Glebe and Rozelle. Dammit, I don’t live there).
10. General nutbags who stare, sing, recite poetry, make proclamations like ‘I farted’ (don’t make eye contact, I repeat, do not make eye contact).
In conclusion, public transport in Sydney sucks canine testicles. Thanks Rail Corp. That is all.
3 years ago